PRINTMid-Mo Drift
Area used- car lots serve the fast and the curious
Area used-car lots serve the fast and the curious
June 10, 2009 | 12:00 p.m. CST
A Vegas hypnotist has nothing on the stereotypical used-car salesman in the persuasion department. For instance, you might wake up on a flashy stage holding your left shoe above your right ear without any recollection of why or how. Or, you might walk out of a used-car dealership holding the keys to an ’80s muscle car and contemplating a mullet. And, that gas-guzzler was probably sold to you at a fair price.
Joe Phelan, co-owner of Mid-Mo Auto Plaza, says his cars are priced exactly where they should be.
“If the seats are torn, I don’t care,” Phelan says, blinking through smudged glasses and pointing to interior wounds with a cigarette. “If (the car) breaks in two pieces, you get to keep both halves.”
If you’ve got $2,500, you could have a piece of any of these cars.
$800 ’95 Chevy Corsica
One man’s legal woes are another man’s treasure. Kyle Luketich, owner and repo man of Marcy Motors, reacquired this red four-door after the buyer stopped payments and went on the run for three months. One of the hubcaps is missing; but Wal-Mart sells plastic chrome spinners, so you can replace all of them. Familiar with the concept of “pay it forward?” The price tag equals the buyer’s remaining debt.
$1395 ’91 Pontiac Sunbird Convertible
It’s hard to think of something more brag-worthy than the recent purchase of a white convertible. This soft-top has 112,000 miles under her belt. So, put the top down, relax, be gentle with the accelerator and cruise. You’re cool now, and even if someone rolls right out of the new-car lot and stops next to you at the intersection, you can at least appreciate that yours is vintage.
$1595 ’78 Ford Ranchero
Urban Dictionary calls it a “cruck.” The owners at Mid-Mo Auto Plaza deemed it the “Green Weenie.” As the four-wheeled version of a mullet — a car from the front and a truck from the back — it’s the ultimate taligate party machine. It comes complete with wooden side panels, and the clashing bed cab is a bonus included in the sticker price. “You wouldn’t be able to find one anywhere else,” Phelan says.
$2000 ’90 Volkswagen Vanagon
This last-generation minibus mimics a cardboard box on wheels. But Brian Fobes, service manager at Walt’s Auto, insists that it’s fun to drive. “For as big a vehicle as they are, they’re really nimble,” he says. The front wheels are right under the driver’s seat, so a blowout would certainly enhance the feel of the road. It gets better. The backseat folds into a bed. “It sleeps four cozy,” Fobes says.
$2500 ’91 Lincoln Town Car
Stretch Limo
Oh, the things one could do in a retired Club Vogue stretch limo. With all the leg room, there’s plenty of space to arrange oneself alluringly on the lap of another. The new owner can also enjoy the ice chest that can hold a six-pack of soda, TV/VCR, double privacy glass and the backseat phone that connects to the driver.
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