May 14, 2009 | 12:00 a.m. CST
Note: check out the visual step-by-step breakdown of Tecktonik at the bottom of your browser. Graphic by Jena Anderson.
Getting into Tecktonik takes two preliminary steps. Step one: Find your tightest pair of pants. Step two: Throw them away, and get some tighter ones.
Step 1: DANCE PROOF
Clear the space of any breakable items or candles. No one wants to tell the fire department the cause was “some sort of break dancing.” Now blast some Yelle or any electronica with a fast tempo.
Step 2: GET IN THE GROOVE
Put your feet shoulder-width apart, yoga style, and stretch your arms out parallel to the floor. Bend your knees in and out, or step your feet together alternately to the beat. Remember, feel the music. 
Step 3: LOOSEN YOUR JOINTS
Now move your arms in a circular motion, hinging at your elbows. Then cross them across your chest hinging at the shoulders instead. Repeat as many times as your biceps will allow. Don’t forget the spirit fingers. 
Step 4: TAKE IT TO THE STREETS
While crossing your arms across your chest, take one arm in an “L” shape, and swipe it over your faux hawk, ahem, head. You did it!
In an interview with BBC, the creators of Tecktonik (pronounced Tech-toe-neek) described it as 80 percent arms and 20 percent legs. This phenomenon, however, is more than the most exhausting, intricate dance trend since the Jitterburg of the ’30s; it’s a culture. Combining various dance styles — mostly hip-hop and techno — Tecktonik features gyrating, exaggerated arm movements. The dancer’s legs are normally shoulder-width apart, so the knees can bend according to tempo and create the illusion of full-body movement.
Since its start in the suburbs of Paris around 2001, Tecktonik has been gaining fame in European dance clubs, hair salons and fitness clubs thanks to the Internet. “Like a lot of other European trends, Tecktonik is derived from techno and nightclubbing and probably grew out of jump-style dancing in Northern Europe,” says MU assistant professor of French Daniel Sipe, who is interested in French youth culture. “I think it’s an innovative and adaptive expression of a globalized music scene.”
Much like emo culture in the United States and Mexico, Tecktonik is a polarizing trend, and its distinct style attracts both negative and positive attention. Kim Hullot-Guiot, 20, a French exchange student at MU, can attest to this. “It doesn’t annoy me personally,” she said in a Facebook message. “But [the] mainstream consider them quite ridiculous and obnoxious. As for their dance … it’s sort of fun, but still this dance is considered ridiculous.” While emo devotees worship black hoodies and pink Jolly Rogers, Tecktonik leads fans to cut their hair into pseudo mullets and groove in ’80s-era high-tops and fitted polo shirts. Day-Glo skinny jeans are a must for impromptu Tecktonik street battles.
Local Tecktonik enthusiast Brian Larsen, 21, heard about it from his lab partner in French class and soon after found the music video for Yelle’s “A Cause Des Garcons” on YouTube, one of the most popular examples of Tecktonik’s extreme style. “Beyond the dance itself, I love the music, and I like the fashion and style,” he says. “It’s borderline ultra-hip mixed with skater fashion.”
Although he admits it would be hard to sport the Tecktonik uniform in Columbia and doesn’t personally dance Tecktonik in public because of his lack of rhythm, Larsen thinks Tecktonik haters don’t see its admirable qualities. “They don’t understand the deeper meaning, and that’s not a ridiculous statement,” he says. “It’s a point of pride because it’s the first real, homegrown style that’s uniquely French.”
Michael Fooshee, 23, who spent time in France in 2006 while a student at MU, ran into the same opposition while abroad. After seeing Tecktonik street battles in Paris, Fooshee liked the dance, but his French friend dismissed it as a fad for a teenage crowd that wouldn’t last long.
“Personally, I think the U.S. is just too lame to support a movement like Tecktonik,” he said via Facebook. “Just one more reason for me to move to France.”
Whether Tecktonik will bust a noticeable move in America is difficult to anticipate. Sipe thinks that even if it did, it might not entirely resemble the Tecktonik that is currently streaming across computer screens because it is already so “fluid and hybridized.”
Adam Boisclair, known locally as DJ Bwa Ha, is more skeptical about Tecktonik’s possible hop across the pond. Boisclair credits Tecktonik’s European popularity to Europe’s more established electronica scene. “It might be popular here maybe in like some electro-house clubs in big, metropolitan cities,” he says. “In Columbia though, I don’t think so. We’re so far behind as it is.”
Wading into the neon-colored waters of Tecktonik might be intimidating, especially in the face of Midwestern culture. But with an assortment of tutorial videos and an inkling of rhythm, if the music moves you, you too can join in on the most sensational thing to come out of France since sliced French bread.
To see Tecktonik in action, check out the Yelle's video for their song "A Cause des Garcons."